A Choice Made With Love: Finding Confidence & Peace in Deciding on Memory Care

Deciding to move a parent to a memory care community is never easy. It’s a choice that can bring up a mix of emotions, not the least of which is the “g” word – guilt. Here’s help with understanding what’s behind these negative feelings, how that affects your actions, and what to do about it.  

What’s Behind Your Feelings and How It Affects Your Well-Being 

Feeling guilty is a common reaction when moving a parent to memory care, for a number of reasons. Perhaps you promised never to place them in a “home,” making the decision feel like a broken vow. Or you feel like you’re failing at caregiving, despite your best efforts. You might feel moving them during an already tough time can feel like adding to their struggles. Making decisions for your parent might feel unnatural and uncomfortable. You might feel guilty about continuing with your own life while they adjust to a new environment. These feelings are natural and stem from a place of deep love and concern. It’s important to recognize that they don’t mean you’ve made the wrong choice. 

Letting guilt take over can affect your well-being in several ways. Persistent guilt can lead to heightened stress and anxiety, emotional strain, depression, or even contribute to physical health issues like high blood pressure. You might second-guess or delay making decisions that are in your parent’s best interest. 

Managing Your Feelings and Embracing Your Decision 

Here are practical steps to help you manage guilt and appreciate the benefits of memory care: 

Find a Supportive Outlet: Connect with friends who have faced similar situations or join a support group. Sharing your feelings can be incredibly helpful.

Focus on the Benefits: Memory care provides specialized support, engaging programs, and opportunities for connection that might be challenging to offer at home.

Give It Time: The transition can be tough, but many families find that their loved one adjusts better than expected.

Reframe Your Role: You’re still caring for your parent, just in a different way. Now, you can focus on quality time and meaningful interactions.

Practice Self-Compassion: Remind yourself that this decision was made with love and the best interests of your parent in mind.

Stay Involved: Regular visits, getting to know the staff, and advocating for your parent’s care can help you feel more connected and in control.

Take Care of Yourself: Prioritize your own health and well-being. Remember, you can’t take care of others if you’re not practicing self-care.

At Artis Senior Living, we’re dedicated to supporting families through every step of the memory care journey. Our compassionate staff and specialized programs are designed to help residents find purpose, belonging and joy, while offering families peace of mind. Choosing memory care is a commitment to ensuring your loved one receives the expert care they deserve, in an environment specially designed for their needs. 

If you’re struggling with feelings of guilt or have questions about memory care, don’t hesitate to reach out. We’re here to help you navigate this journey and provide the support you need.  